All bold text is from quoted directly from the book.

Saturday, May 14th (bumped to Saturday, May 17th)

Oh my god, what the fuck!  I was at work today cross-referencing inventory or something, and guess who I saw.  Christian Motherfucking Grey!  He said he was in the area to stock up on a few things, but couldn’t he get this stuff in Seattle?  He wanted cable ties and tape and rope, and what is he, a stalkerish serial killer?  I know he could get this shit up in Seattle!  He kept asking questions about my life, and asked what else I suggested he get.  Was I supposed to say, a body bag?  I told him coveralls to keep his clothes clean, even though it’s clear he doesn’t do any laboring.  That freak told me sure, and that he could always take them off.  More inappropriate sex talk.  I think some of what my dad said about how to handle stressful situations from his Army days sunk into my head more than I thought because I started refocusing on how physically attracting Christian is.  It’s like you laugh so you don’t cry.  I thought about his looks so I wouldn’t vomit from how scared I was that he came to Portland from Seattle to get stuff he could buy there, stuff used to kill people, and I don’t think it was a coincidence that he came into Clayton’s today.  He found out where I work and stalked me here, I know he did!  I turned down his attempt at a job offer, offended him, and now he’s going to kill me.  Oh my god I’m so scared.

I managed to calm myself down, and it helped when he asked about the article.  Okay, something we can relate on.  Good.  Nice, safe, relatable.  I was relieved He’s finally asked me a normal question, away from all the innuendo and double talk…  I could kick myself though for telling him Kate wishes she had original pictures.  He pretty much invited me to have pictures taken, and have me his card.  Well, Kate’s going to be happy, and that’s a relief.  I’m a bit relieved too since he probably won’t hurt me if she’s around.  He wouldn’t want to destroy his rep.

I was so, so glad when my friend Paul got there so I wasn’t alone with Christian.  I got a big hug from Paul, and a scary look from Christian.  It was cold enough that Paul picked up on it and kept me an arm’s length away.  He ended up knowing who Christian is and fan-boy’d all over him, but Christian kept that frightening look.  He got pissy, and I think I offended him.  He paid and left and I breathed freely finally.

He can’t really be a killer or anyone bad.  It had to just have been a coincidence that he came here.  Maybe he meant he was in town, and he just has an art project in his hotel room.  He’s hot, and I wouldn’t have to know what I was doing.  I started feeling bad for suspecting him of wrong-doing.  Maybe I could like him a little.  I’m feeling a strange tingling, so maybe my nerves are just the first step of falling for someone, and maybe I’m just making up all the bad stuff in my head.  He’s rich and successful, so people have to like him.  Yes, I can to.

When I got a few minutes alone, I called Kate.  Kate was excited about me getting his personal number on that business card, not thrilled Christian will only be here tomorrow, I think, when her regular photographer is gone.  I suggested José to do the photos, and she agreed, and then told me I have a relationship with Christian.  No I don’t!

Even after I got him, Kate wouldn’t let up, and she made me call him.  It was a quick call and we set up a time and place for tomorrow, and Kate jumped back onto the relationship stuff.  Christian and I don’t have one!  But she teased me.  Maybe I Blushed during the call, I don’t know.  I feel like I’m being steam-rolled in a lot of ways right now.  Christian scaring me, which has to be in my head.  Kate pushing met toward him, even after I told her he is intimidating.  Paul asked me out again (oh, I forgot about that, but after Christian left the store, he did).  I just want things to go back to how they were before that interview.  I didn’t didn’t know what was wrong that I didn’t get weird flutters for anyone, but at least there wasn’t a possible killer interested in me.


Met # of days ago: 5

Days with contact: 2

Number of days dating: 0

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