In a few days, I’ll write about how this is relevant to my books, and why it may change my in-progress draft for my third book.

I get it.  No, not really, but let’s pretend I do.  You’re upset that today’s ruling means other people have the same rights as you.  Maybe you’re upset because the bible says it’s wrong.  The bible also says swearing at your parents is punishable by death.  Maybe you just plain think that two women or two men having sex is gross because you wouldn’t want to do what they do.  Well, a lot of opposite-sex couples do thinks not every other opposite-sex couple wants to do.  Maybe you think the point of marriage is procreation. Does that go for people who don’t want to have children, are infertile, can’t have children because it’s not safe for them, and people over their childbearing years?  Perhaps you’re concerned that some kids will only have moms or only have dads.  Newsflash for you: Single parenthood is already common, and most of those kids only have solitary parent, not two.  Whatever your reason, you’re upset and let down that other people now have the same rights.

I would like to tell you why you don’t need to be upset, scared, or offended, and why you should get your knickers out of a twist and to stop clutching the pearls.


Nothing in today’s ruling affects your marriage. Your marriage is just as it always have been. If it’s been sacred to you before today, then it should still be sacred to you. If Brittany Spears’ “just for fun” marriage of 72 hours didn’t affect your marriage, then two same-sex people getting married won’t affect it either.

Not yet married? Then still, no worries! You don’t have to marry someone of your sex just because two other people now can.

If marriage only had meaning because marriage was withheld from others, then all that gave your marriage any meaning is hate, and that’s sad, but you can still be married and get married just the same as you always have.

If you’re worried about others having to give the same service to same sex couples, again, don’t worry. Those people have the same choice available to them as people who are against interracial marriage have. They can get a job in a different industry, or go work for a religious non-profit, where discrimination will remain allowable.

If you’re worried about the bakers and pizza places that have to give equal service (today’s ruling might not add sexuality to the list of federally protected classifications of people anyway), making a cake doesn’t mean you support the marriage of a same-sex couple any more than it means you support the fifth marriage of a serial-adulterer. Making that cake just means you’re following the laws for your job, or, if you’re the owner the establishment, then you’re merely upholding the laws you agreed to when you decided to open the establishment.

If you’re worried about churches, today’s ruling only affect civil marriages, aka the government side of things. You may not realize it, but churches can still choose who to marry. In fact, churches can, and do, turn away interracial couples, or even same-race couples, solely for race. In 2012, the First Baptist Church in Crystal Springs, Mississippi did just that. They turned away a black couple, and no wedding for any black person has been held there since 1883. As a non-government non-profit religious institution, the church can do that, just like any church can still refuse to do a same-sex ceremony today. So don’t worry that your precious church might have to all a same-sex couple to dedicate their lives to each other in a ceremony of love. Your church won’t have to. No church will have to.

Literally nothing has changed for YOU. You don’t have to marry a same-sex partner, and your marriage is no less valid. Nothing has changed regarding religious freedom. Churches don’t have to marry same-sex couples, and no one’s forcing you to approve of an couple who gets married, whether they’re same-sex couples of people who are on their eighth and tenth marriages. It’s life as it’s always been for you. So chill. It’s fine. I promise you, you’ll be as fine as you’ve always been.

It's Okay, Bro